Saturday, November 14, 2009 − Night Interrupted

Could not take Thamel, the tourist area in Kathmandu so I went to Pokhara, also touristy but more pleasant. Have I mentioned I love my little room in my new hotel? Well, I love my little room in this new building of the Chetrie Sisters. The one problem is that I must share a bathroom. Hell, it's the Chetrie SISTERS so I figure it's going to mostly women. First, it's just me, but two nights ago, a couple moved in, a hetero couple, which means a man, which means I need to check the toilet seat now. I have pretty good sleep in this little room except for being waken in the morning by a screaming kid, a screaming spoiled Nepali kid. What is that about? Doesn't he know he has a lot more misery to come and this temper tantrum will only be the start of a lot of hardships far worse than momma saying no. Toughen up. So, like I was saying the sleep is usually good. It gets quite cold here at night and with a warm comforter I am snug in my bed, even too warm. I have to say I have acclimated to the warm days cool nights quite well. I am rather surprised. These cool nights for me mean great sleep. Since no one was generally here, I have seen a couple of women who have come and gone, it is very quiet. Sometimes I think I am here alone. Well, in the past few days more, different people have arrived. The couple and now a man or two across the hall, luckily, they have their own bathroom. But now, I realize how noisy these stone stairwells can be especially with the doors with only these deadbolts that slide and bang. So, last night I was awoken by my shared bathroom guy, puking. All night long the slide of the deadbolts and the puking. This particularly night there was also funny cow noises but that I could've slept through. The retching and door banging amplified by echo could not be ignored. On the one hand, you feel bad for the poor guy, but on the other hand, I did want him to shut up. He was probably sleeping in between runs but just as I was dozing off, up he would go and wake me. I was hoping that at least he would stop locking his door. No one is going into a puker's room. Finally, I got up and found some earplugs and returned to my restful slumber. Turned out both of them had gotten food poisoning at one of the more upscale restaurants here and had been tag teaming the commode. This explained the lack of whispered "are you ok honey?"

Thursday, October 22, 2009 − Passing Through Bangkok

In Bangkok Thailand, passing through on my way to Nepal. I could've passed right on through with maybe only a night but I decided to see what little I haven't seen. Maybe hook up with some people I know. Arrived in the afternoon, went to a nearby park for something to do, to get me out of the hotel. Here’s the deal. I am not a good tourist. I am not that interested in sights. I don't really want to research the best places to eat, stay or see. I really want to just experience a place. I prefer to finagle meeting people who live in a place. That doesn't usually work out given my personality. So, I then go see the sights as a reason to move about. After a number of trips here, I finally decided I wanted to see the river. I bought one of those tourist tickets, for 120Baht, about $4, which I think may have been a complete waste of money. I think I could've just paid 13Baht per ride on the local boat. I only got on and off a couple of times. Plus, after my initial trip, I never saw another tourist boat again. However, the tourist boat gave me a nice brochure and gave me an introduction to the river. I think if I were to do it again, I still might pay the extra money because I like the unlimited rides but this time I would sit by the tour announcer and ask a bunch of questions.

I am surprisingly tired here in Bangkok. It's not really the heat since I just came from Hanoi, but it could be that all that motorbike riding has made me soft. Regardless, as I was moving from one subway system to another, I found I was a little tired. So I stopped one of the many malls for an iced coffee. I forgot to use the toilet before I left so by the time I reached the boat, I already had to pee. My plan was to ride the boat to the end and hop my way back down. I don't think this was a good plan since I now believe the tourist boat hops up but makes a beeline back. So after just a few stops, I hopped off spontaneously. It was a great area, tons of street food which I followed aimlessly. I thought there was a temple at this stop. As the food stalls gave way, I saw a sign for museum. I do enjoy a small museum, and so I followed the signs also believing that this was the barge museum the older couple I followed off the boat were seeking. I followed the signs in to a humongous hospital complex: Building after building of hospital, clinics, and nursing homes including hospital staff in white uniforms and nurses with the old fashioned hat, like my Barbie had when I was a kid. I thought I would be passing through and on my way to the barge museum, but alas the signs lead me elsewhere, to a medical museum. This little museum, the Siriraj Medical Museum, tucked away down a side street of this medical area, on the second floor of what I assume was a school, made the Mutter Museum in Philedelphia look like a children's museum. There were real mummified bodies, and image after image of mutilated bodies. I was starting to feel queasy, but perhaps that was due to the pervasive industrial glue smell. Small but certainly worth the visit.

After leaving, I wandered back to score some street food. I eat completely willy nilly without concern for intestinal infestations. Hanoi makes Bangkok look clean. I ate some sort of vegetable fried thing and some not delicious melon after heading back to the pier to continue my journey. You know outside of the US and parts of Europe, there is no regard for public safety. On every corner, there is a lawsuit waiting to happen, except they are unheard of. The pier area was attached to the market area by a few planks due to recent flooding. As I sat and dined on my treats in plastic baggies eaten with a skewer, a presumably Thai man came shaking onto the planks, walking with a cane, one leg in a bandage, one hand palsied. He didn't look sturdy, perhaps just released from the hospital. He had a name tag around his neck. He may even be mentally disabled also. To my relief, a well dressed Asian touristy fellow came to his aid. He had a difficult time getting him across the planks and just onto the pier, the man collapsed in perhaps some sort of fit. Difficult to watch. At this point, the crowd for the boat was quite large. The nice man along with boat staff managed to get him to a bench. He cried, and people gave him money. The nice man seemed to be gesturing back from where he came. Was he offering to take him back to the hospital or a taxi ride home? When the non−tourist boat came, I got on to be away from that heart wrenching scene.

I had no destination in mind but thought I would just ride till the end of the line. The day was lightly rainy, and a bit cool on the boat, says the person having spent summer in SE Asia. So, I rode and rode, enjoying the scenery, wondering who lived on the river and why. At the end of the line, Nonthaburi, I got off in masse. They seemed to be setting up for a night market. I walked by this huge building and wondered what was this fabulous building. Walked through the street looking at the many many things to buy. Bangkok is really a shopper's paradise. Then circled back and headed toward the boat. Who do you think I saw ambling along that road? The crying disabled man. He was limping with a cane but certainly looked merry as he practically skipped down the road. I guess they are everywhere. Certainly in Chicago and New York, the reason I hold firmly to my cash.

Back at the pier, I saw a sign for a museum. So off I scampered, it was a tiny little thing in that huge building I was admiring earlier. A museum about Nonthaburi, mostly about the pottery. It was small but very well done including a diorama with miniature digital men loading up a boat.

What a wonderful unplanned day. I guess had I gone with an agenda these tiny museums would've been a letdown but with no expectations at all, these were all such happy surprises.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009 − Vietnam in Conclusion

My visa was to expire in a few weeks. I convinced one of my schools to give me a part−time contract. A week before, my visa was to expire, the school told me I would only get a one month visa and after that they didn't know. I had to be out of my room by the end of the month, my one private student was going home for almost 2 months, one class ran only to the end of the month, and the other mid way into November. What was I fighting for? There was very little going on and lots of stuff ending. So, within a day I decided to leave, and within two, I decided to go to Nepal. It's funny how I make decisions. Sometimes, I am very logical and think things carefully through but that hasn’t really worked out so well for me, so now I just mull things over. I let a train of thought carry me to some questionable conclusion. I visited Nepal in March of 2008, just over a year and a half ago. I had hoped to open an artist residency program there but that project has been put on the back burner for economic reasons. When I was in Nepal, I met a young woman who was volunteering at a children's home called Umbrella. I visited. It seemed good. You paid room and board, $100 but in the scheme of things that's nothing. So, I sent them email, again. Back in Decemberish, I had a similar thought but they never got back to me until they told me they were expecting me the following week. Oops. Guess they forgot to let me know I could come. It was too short of notice by then and perhaps I had a different idea for that moment. So, I told them no. This time however they sent me email saying they now had an application form and room and board now cost about $250. Well, now that is starting to be real money. But in the meantime, I stumbled across a month long meditation retreat starting in November. (http://www.kopan-monastery.com) So, now I trained my sights on that. My original purpose of going to Nepal was out the window, but I was still going, but now for the retreat. Because of the flight, plus the cost of the retreat, the expense is going to be great. Had I realized that I never would have considered it. Also, if I had still been working, with visa and place to live in Hanoi, I certainly would not be going on retreat. It must be fate. My decision to go to Hanoi was a similar process; Thought occurred to me on a Friday and by Monday I was making my plans.

I realize that many of you perhaps find my life rather exotic, and I probably would too. IF I were not living it. It's a bit terrifying to leave a country with a few thousand dollars in your pocket and that’s all you got. I am a woman of modest needs but even still, I spend about $800 a month in Asia, living, not even travelling. So, that few thousand dollars will not last long. It freaks me out when I think about it.

I have been in Hanoi for almost six months. The process of getting there was fairly easy as was my life there. Now, there was the usual adjustment period which caused some angst but it is also during this time when things are really exciting. After a few months, I adjust, life there becomes normal but my interest also wanes. I am sure this is typical. The one thing that did change was that I rented a motorbike. That certainly added some spice to my life. Again, at first it caused stress but later much joy with my new found freedom. In the end, I loved driving motorbike and was sorry to leave it because I knew wherever I went, I would not be driving one again. For the most part, it was super easy to find work teaching English in Hanoi. I hadn't really looked for housing but I don't think that was an issue. There were even hotels that catered to this crowd of long term stayers. I had a group with whom I meditated. I had friends who actually called me to do things. I could even be spontaneous. Call someone on the phone (well sms/text really) and have plans for an hour later. It was my idea of a social life. One week, I even forced myself to not call anyone on my night off because I needed some alone time. It was very difficult to do, especially when you even run into friends on the streets.

I would definitely go back to Hanoi, and I might in a few months. This time I will work like a dog for a few months since I might only get a 3 month visa. Save my money so that when my visa doesn't get renewed. I am foot loose and fancy free.

I realize that many of you perhaps find my life rather exotic, and I probably would too. IF I were not living it. It’s a bit terrifying to leave a country with a few thousand dollars in your pocket and that’s all you got. I am a woman of modest needs but even still, I spend about $800 a month in Asia, living, not even travelling. So, that few thousand dollars will not last long. It freaks me out when I think about it.

I have been in Hanoi for almost six months. The process of getting there was fairly easy as was my life there. Now, there was the usual adjustment period which caused some angst but it is also during this time when things are really exciting. After a few months, I adjust, life there becomes normal but my interest also wanes. I am sure this is typical. The one thing that did change was that I rented a motorbike. That certainly added some spice to my life. Again, at first it caused stress but later much joy with my new found freedom. In the end, I loved driving motorbike and was sorry to leave it because I knew wherever I went, I would not be driving one again. For the most part, it was super easy to find work teaching English in Hanoi. I hadn’t really looked for housing but I don’t think that was an issue. There were even hotels that catered to this crowd of long term stayers. I had a group with whom I meditated. I had friends who actually called me to do things. I could even be spontaneous. Call someone on the phone (well sms/text really) and have plans for an hour later. It was my idea of a social life. One week, I even forced myself to not call anyone on my night off because I needed some alone time. It was very difficult to do, especially when you even run into friends on the streets.

I would definitely go back to Hanoi, and I might in a few months. This time I will work like a dog for a few months since I might only get a 3 month visa. Save my money so that when my visa doesn’t get renewed. I am foot loose and fancy free.

Saturday, June 20, 2009 − Floating Garden

When living in high population density places, one has to be creative about space: storage space, living spaces, and open spaces. I have heard that in the Philippines there are people who have made houses that hang off a bridge. In the larger western cities, we have created rooftop gardens. I recently found this floating garden in Hanoi. Fabulous. It reminds me of something out of "Water World" in which they are trying to create terra firma on the water. It was an older couple making this and they were actively working on it while I was there. They were not thrilled with my picture taking. I wished I could speak Vietnamese because I had many questions. What did they grow.? Why were they growing it? To sell or just personal use? Where did they get the idea?

Thursday, June 18, 2009 − Dealing with the Asian Dogs

My fear of the dark has been replaced by an almost paralyzing fear of dogs. The dogs here aren't like fiddo at home. The fight dogs in Thailand and India used to keep me awake at night. There are tons of "pet" dogs roaming the streets. The worst of course are the ones just out sit of their own homes. I have struggled with how to deal with them. A Thai friend told me to ignore them and just keep walking. Another friend told me to pick up a stone and through it at them, or even just reach pretend you have one works too. At one point, a friend had a pack of 5 puppies that I watched grow. Gosh they were cute and rancorous. One day as we were sitting outside, I wanted to play with those little devils so I playfully ran at the puppy as if in a game of tag or something. What would a dog in the US do? It would run away and circle around and bark at you in a fun game. What did this puppy in Thailand do? It went squealing away as if I had beaten it with a stick. I felt terrible; I suppose the dog did too. I am guessing a game of fetch might have ended in a similar way. I am not exactly sure when this fear arouse. At one point, a scary mangy crosseyed dog nearly attacked me in Thailand. We were in a stand off and then he charged. I was freaking out until a man came up and chased it away. Actually, freaking out would’ve been a good thing; screaming and waving my arms would've scared him off. In the US, screaming and waving ones arms at an angry dog would've done nothing but here the dogs have much more experience with be beaten. I have a dog here in the alley where I live in which we were ending up in one of those awful standoffs. I would freeze. It would look at me, hackles would go up, and growl. I needed to get past that dog and that was the only way out. Finally I started to yell and wave my arms and the dog would go squealing away. A few days later, I ran into that dog in a more open area near the alley. It looked at me fearfully and moved away. I was surprised. I am afraid of it. It is afraid of me too? I had a better understanding of the dog's psychology. I even felt bad that this creature felt bad too. That was when I decided to handle that doggie situation differently. So I tried to just ignore it and walk past. Thankfully it worked. I have learned the standoff is the worst position to be in. The other week I went for a walk and wandered into one of the many temples. I was taking pictures through a locked door when I turned to see a dog creeping up on me. I knew it was time to leave . So given my friend's advice, I ignored it and headed to the gate. I didn't want to allow the dog to block my path. Just as I was on the threshold, the dog "attacked" me from behind. I turned and swung my camera at it and an old man called it off a moment later. My heart was pondering. For the next few days, I was totally terrified of dogs even if it gave no indication of being mean. At one point I was wandering the tiny streets looking for a friend's house and there was dog up ahead. I knew I didn't want a stand off so I waited at the end until a young guy came along. I told him I was afraid of the dog so he went ahead and blocked it with his motorbike while I continued on. His kindness was really sweet but nevertheless, my terror was rising. I am still learning but in a nutshell, this is the way to handle Asian dogs:

• Avoid the standoff at all costs. Once a standoff is established, more aggression will be needed to end it.
  
• Yell, scream, stomp your feet, wave your arms like a crazy person if you are feeling threatened.
  
• Carry a stick, umbrella or rocks to shake and throw. Pretend if you don't.
  
• Keep a wary eye on the dog at all times but don't act too interested.
  
• If the dog looks menacing, threaten with your "weapons" sooner than later.
  

Friday, June 12, 2009 − Loneliness

I am a little reluctant to write this for fear that I am not sending the right message but I feel that this is totally a part of travel, particularly if you are a 43 year old solo woman who isn't into partying. Also, I am trying to help those of you who are living vicariously through me to get the real feeling of living here. Oh, my glamorous life as an economic refuge. There was a whirlwind of meeting people when I first arrived. Ok, perhaps whirlwind is a bit too dramatic, and way exaggerated, but I made contact with people but that has petered out. One reason is that I have arrived at the start of the hot season and everyone is fleeing. Either they are long term residents taking a few months leave or they are shorter term residents who have decided this is a good season to leave. So already, I know at least 4 people who have or are leaving soon. I have met some fabulous 20 somethings but let's face it, there is no long term friendship there, really just a tolerance. I did meet one man about my age but it turned out that his "friends" were bargirls. The long term residents, not even my housemates, are into befriending the outsiders, short timers. People are cordial, even friendly but they will never invite you anywhere, perhaps this is a hazing period, or just self preservation on their part. Whatever it is, I am alone. My coworkers at the English school are either old bitter alcoholic hasbeens or young partiers passing through, hoping to earn some cash before traveling on. This is a real transition time in Hanoi. I understand that but when I enter the weekend realizing that I have not one single social plan, I feel lonely. I know that sitting home will not help so I will go to the expat cinema but my lonely desperation (isn't that lyrics somewhere) makes me freeze up like a deer in headlights (now that has to be lyrics). I just have to put my Buddhist practice into practice and accept what is, and know that it is impermanent.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009 − This How It Happens

This is how it happens. I set off in the morning to beat the heat but essentially it's already too late. I will run a few errands near each other. Xe om to first location then walk "not too far" to second stop. It's nearby on the map. I walk some. It's hot so I stop for a cold drink, no not a beer. I get directions. I walk some more. I get directions again. I get hassled over and over by taxis and xe om drivers who sometimes pretend they will show me the direction on the map. I walk some more. I finish my water. I stop in at a hotel I could never afford to stay in. I use their bathroom and soak up their air conditioning. Refreshed, I set off again. More walking. Errand complete. Dehydrated, hungry and crabby. Cannot eat street food, too too hot. End up at mall eating western food. This is how it happens.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009 − Stupid

I had two interviews today which turned out to be quite far from my house. So, after much back and forth about distance and money. The motorcycle taxi guy and I agreed on 120,000VND roundtrip, which is about $7. It was very far but not in the place I had thought so after my morning appointment it seemed easier to just have him take me to my second appointment which was at 1pm. I would eat something and sit around for awhile. We seemed in agreement. He would pick me up at 14:00 as he wrote with his finger on his hand. Very good. I went to my meeting. Went to the designated meeting point. And I thought I saw him a bit away. So, I waved at him. Happy about the perfect timing. Well, he seems different, a bit aggressive, and I think he has been drinking. Would not be my first experience with a drunken Xe Om driver. We were off. He isn't driving as well. Seems to be very distracted. He takes me to the Old Quarter which could be on my way home. Don't really know why we are stopping. He speaks to me in Vietnamese but I don't know what he is saying, of course. I am so confused. Finally I say home, in Vietnamese, and the neighborhood I live in. So, he seems to get it. He is asking people how to get there which really freaks me out because my motorcycle taxi guy is my neighbor, I thought. Finally we get close enough to my home and I give up, get off and give him 200,000VND about $11. I am surprised that he doesn't argue with me more because all in all it was a very long trip and day. Disgusted with strange stupid drunken man I just go home. Well, hours later, my roommate, whom I rarely see, comes and says there is someone who is there to see me. Ok, so it’s 8 at night, dark, who is it? I think maybe it's someone I knew from 2007. I step outside and it's this old Vietnamese man. And he starts to speak, of course I have no idea what he is talking about. My roommate translates that he went to pick me up at 2pm and where was I. HOLYSHIT. The light bulb goes on. I got a ride home with the wrong driver. I am so stupid. Thankfully, the Vietnamese don't have one of those you-think-we-all-look-alike syndromes, but maybe they will now. Well, in my defense, mostly I just saw the back of his head, err helmet actually. No one seems as amused as me. He wasn't saying, you stupid bitch, where is my money. He seems solely upset that I wasn't there. Not that that wasn't bad but really, he should've been there with his hand out. Anyway, I went to get my money and ask how much. He says 170,000VND, hmmm... not bad considering all the distance he and I travelled. So I gave him 250,000VND, about $14 for being such an idiot. He was happy and I repaired my guilt, but not my stupid and humiliated ego.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009 − Vietnamese Coffee

Sometimes when I roam the streets, where ever I am, I have magical experiences. Well, perhaps I exaggerate but I do have loads of fun exploring. When I returned to New York City, after being away a year, I would go to free nights at the museums, alone, then window shop at the exclusive stores on Madison Avenue while eating black and white cookies and drinking bodega coffee (oh how my heart aches already.) Well, on this particular day in Hanoi, I ended up wander around West Lake. Saw people fishing. Saw greenery. Stumbled upon a few temples. That particular day, the truly special thing was the coffee. I love the Vietnamese coffee. It is so rich that it's almost chocolaty. Add some sweetened condensed milk and you have ambrosia.

Friday, May 8, 2009 − Vietnamese Buddha

The art museum here in Hanoi is nice, also small and diverse. Some of my favorite things are the Buddhist statues which I think are very unusual. As it turns out they are made in part of lacquer. The statues are unlike anything I have seen before in Thailand, Hong Kong or India and Nepal.